Why is it that sometimes life can seem so simple and then something happens and it turns into this complex mess?
I feel so overwhelmed. So out of control. Not sure what I want. Where I want to go. What I want to do. Then I think about those 4 statements and realize they all included the selfishness of "I". I'd like to think I'm not a selfish person, but I'd be lying if I said I wasnt. I'm human.
Have you ever felt like you dont belong? It seems like I feel that way so often. No family relations really. I have friends, yes, but how many of them really know me. I dont know what I want. I do my best to cling to the Lord, but sometimes that feels hopeless too. I know its not. I have to unbusy myself and fall into His arms. I am doing so much. All of it for His kingdom, but if I am not spiritually fed, then what good am I? I'm not. I am nothing.
I pray for His direction. I just want His best for my life. But what does that entail? What if I make the wrong decision again? My poor heart cant take it again, it just cant. I want to know that I'm headed in the right direction and not just moving towards comfort. I'm not sure what to do. I need help. Answers. The right words and signs to show me what to do next.
Proverbs 3:5-6
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Monday, December 8, 2008
Let it flow....
Today has been an emotional day. So many things running through my mind all came crashing down once I got home and had time to stop and think. After a little bit of cleaning and studying, the Lord brought me to a place in the Bible that He seems to show me a lot lately; 1 Corinthians 13.
I recently read a love story by Karen Kingsbury where one of the lines in the book says something to the effect of love not falling from the sky, but something that takes work and commitment. I grew up on Cinderella and fairy tales and am still a die hard fan of it, but when reality sets in, I come to the realization that none of that is for real. My prince charming, as amazing as he is, did not sweep me off my feet and we did not ride away on his white horse into the sunset.
After reading 1 Corinthians 13 for probably about the 1000000 time in my life, I can plainly see that no where in that chapter of love does it say that it comes easy. Love is selfless, willing to do whatever it takes, honoring and respecting others. Love is work! Love can only be obtained through Him and then it is able to flow through us to others. Why cant I not grasp this concept? I am so stuck on my prince and his white horse that I often forget that sometimes it will be hard. We will not always agree on everything and thats okay. Sometimes our castle will be a bit messy because lets face it, I will never have servants, but thats okay too. All that matters is that we are both working at this thing called love and we are daily seeking His love so that it may overflow from our hearts to not only one another, but to everyone around us as well.
How blessed we are to have this love. Some never find it. But He was gracious enough to let us find it. Let us not take it for granted. Let me not forget, how much I love you, you love me, but most importantly, how much He loves us. I pray that He uses us in so many ways my love. To bless those around us and to bless one another. What a great thing we have; this love from Him. Just wanted to share it with you and everyone else.
I love you Troy William Hahr. Thank you for all that you do for me. Let His love continue to flow through you as you walk through this life doing His will.
I recently read a love story by Karen Kingsbury where one of the lines in the book says something to the effect of love not falling from the sky, but something that takes work and commitment. I grew up on Cinderella and fairy tales and am still a die hard fan of it, but when reality sets in, I come to the realization that none of that is for real. My prince charming, as amazing as he is, did not sweep me off my feet and we did not ride away on his white horse into the sunset.
After reading 1 Corinthians 13 for probably about the 1000000 time in my life, I can plainly see that no where in that chapter of love does it say that it comes easy. Love is selfless, willing to do whatever it takes, honoring and respecting others. Love is work! Love can only be obtained through Him and then it is able to flow through us to others. Why cant I not grasp this concept? I am so stuck on my prince and his white horse that I often forget that sometimes it will be hard. We will not always agree on everything and thats okay. Sometimes our castle will be a bit messy because lets face it, I will never have servants, but thats okay too. All that matters is that we are both working at this thing called love and we are daily seeking His love so that it may overflow from our hearts to not only one another, but to everyone around us as well.
How blessed we are to have this love. Some never find it. But He was gracious enough to let us find it. Let us not take it for granted. Let me not forget, how much I love you, you love me, but most importantly, how much He loves us. I pray that He uses us in so many ways my love. To bless those around us and to bless one another. What a great thing we have; this love from Him. Just wanted to share it with you and everyone else.
I love you Troy William Hahr. Thank you for all that you do for me. Let His love continue to flow through you as you walk through this life doing His will.
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